Expectations much like assumptions are the mother of all f**k ups. A statement one of my oldest dearest friends says to me any time I use the word “Expect”
The expectations we set up on ourselves and others manifest too much within our lives. We all expect way to much of ourselves and others and this doesn’t reap any reward to any of the parties involved.
Internally we have expectations of ourselves this can be in so many form but what drives this expectation the most is ego. Our ego drives us to strive for unrealistic expectations and when we fail its detrimental to us on a mental level which filters in to our physical existence. The word fail in itself proves we expected something of ourselves. Goals are created from dreams but there should be no line of expectation on them if they are our dreams why do we pressurise ourselves to define if we have succeeded or not, we are expecting an outcome. Again that word expect, imagine if we changed the word to accept. To accept instead of expect changes the feeling we have toward what ever it is we are expecting, instead we accept it and get on with whatever life throws at us next.
Our expectations of others can be even more detrimental. We place a lot more pressure on people around us to perform to our morals or life expectations. The irony is they have no idea of our expectations for them. Then we get angry, upset, hurt, annoyed, frustrated at them not meeting our expectations. Who made this rule book up? Oh that’s right we did. Who are we damaging the most with these expectations? Only ourselves.
The only other expectation which is another strange rule book was written by society…..Oh how controversial it can be. Expecting to act a certain way, to be sheep of this world, to conform. On a personal level the expectation from society that I have a job, buy a house, settle down, get married, have a child, two point four children written all over that rule book. If we break away from the norm of these expectations we get called all kinds of things and on occasions labelled unstable. Everyone has an idea how they think we should lead our lives but non about their own. If we expect nothing from anyone then we are never disappointed.
If we live our lives with no expectations it means everything is a bonus. But that's easier said then done. Expecting is built in to us since we were children a lot is expected of us as we grow in to our body and minds. Its deep seeded in to our subconscious we may not even realise the expectations we are setting on ourselves or people. To stop this a pattern has to be broken, the pattern starts within the self.
Our yoga practice teachers us to help let go of expectations. When we enter in to the yoga world we may come with expectations on how we think our practice should be, how our body should react, our minds, that we should be able to do the same as the person next to us on the mat. Slowly with time we learn that we come to the mat for ourselves and ourselves alone and we are all there for different reasons.
Trying not to have any expectations can be hard the best way for us too tackle the old "expect" word is to have positive expectations. Like any positive mindset this can take time to change how you think and the positive side of what you expect of yourself, others and situations.
We should try to have positive, powerful expectations for ourselves, without being self delusional, sometimes we dont expect much from ourselves we think we might mess up or fail which is a negative expectation but if we turn that in to a positive statement you may may not know the outcome but no matter what happens I expect I will do my best, to believe in your expectation in yourself, expect to fail yes fail but when you do the positive statement is you tried your best and you learn from it.
There are good people in this world who are inspiring, supportive, who want to achieve there dreams, who want to help others. We all want that but we expect what we see and if there is a lot of negativity around us ie on Tv, the news as a great example we can start to manifest this in to our lives. They say be careful who you surround yourself with. Do you have a circle or a cage.
Believe and expect positive things for yourself.
Believe and expect positive things from others.
Believe and expect positive outcomes in your life.
Try to change your outlook on life expect positive things and in time you will be rewarded.